So long, suckers

As you may have noticed, the era of The Tao appears to be over. Several people have said that the last post was not a fitting way to go out and we agree. And so, we leave you with toilet humor from Icelandic soccer:



Because if there is one thing The Tao always promoted, it was bathroom humor. Until we're bored again, we leave you with a quote from the talisman of this blog, King Hippo:

I have my weakness. But I won't tell you! Ha Ha Ha!

And a quote from the blog's inspiration, Tupac:

It's like if you plant something in the concrete and if it grow and the rose petal got all kinda scratches and marks, you ain't gonna say "damn, look at all the scratches and marks on the rose that grew from the concrete.." you gonna be like "DAMN! a ROSE grew from the CONCRETE?

Wimbledon: tragic morality tale

Xan Brooks had the unenvious task of liveblogging (as the kids like to say) Wimbledon yesterday when the longest match in history between John Isner and Nicolas Mahut was in progress. The tiebreaker for the fifth set was tied at 59-59 (that's games, not points) when it was called for darkness, to resume today. As the match wore on, Brooks himself descended into brilliant lunacy. Some examples:

On and on they go. Soon they will sprout beards and their hair will grow down their backs, and their tennis whites will yellow and then rot off their bodies. And still they will stand out there on Court 18, belting aces and listening as the umpire calls the score. Finally, I suppose, one of them will die.

and

The scoreboard is barely visible through the grass and weeds and trails of Spanish moss. It shows that John Isner and Nicolas Mahut are locked at 37 games each in the final set.

I'm wondering if maybe an angel will come and set them free. Is this too much to ask? Just one slender angel, with white wings and a wise smile, to tell them that's it's all right, they have suffered enough and that they are now being recalled. The angel could hug them and kiss their brows and invite them to lay their rackets gently on the grass. And then they could all ascend to heaven together. John Isner, Nicolas Mahut and the kind angel that saved them.

It's the best piece of spontaneous writing we've seen in a long time. Yesterday's blog appears here, with the fun beginning around 3:45. Check it.

Sorry for the lack of posting

We've been busy.

The people's champion

Is this the weirdest commercial ever?

It's been a while since we've had a funny commercial to post. Hit it, Skittles:

Mooning spectator causes racer to crash

K-Strass: Midwestern Hero

Another gem from Deadspin. Short version: a weird guy calling himself "K-Strass" has tricked at least half a dozen Midwestern TV stations that he is a yo-yo expert who can perform cool tricks. When he gets on the air he does this:

Fear the deer

The Milwaukee Bucks are playing the Atlanta Hawks in the NBA playoffs. The Bucks showed this clip on the scoreboard during one of the games:


Good production.

Player scores goal, celebrates by imitating Double Dragon

H/t: Deadspin

The Fresh Prince strikes again

The meta-ist Hitler video

The studio that made Downfall, the movie from which the Hitler subtitle meme videos all derive, recently started submitting copyright claims on these videos and having Youtube pull them down. Someone had the brilliant idea to make a Hitler video out of it, and did it brilliantly. The part about "realizing the irony" made us laugh out loud:




H/t: Volokh Conspiracy

Joakim Noah: Saying what everyone else is thinking.

Backstory: Joakim Noah of the Chicago Bulls previously said that there was nothing to do in Cleveland. The Cleveland fans booed Noah mercilessly when the Bulls came to Cleveland for the playoffs and Noah responded with a big game in Game 2. Then Noah doubled down in the post-game press conference:



Harsh but true. No one vacations in Cleveland.

College baseball rain delays are better than college baseball games

FAU and WKU present Rain Delay Theatre @ Yahoo! Video

Canucks' green men are ready for the playoffs.

This gives new meaning to "say hello to my little friend."

Yes, we know it's been around for a while. And yes, we realize it's fake, but this school play production of Scarface is too awesome not to post:

We're not late; we're early for next year

H/t: Eric

It's almost enough to make me watch C-Span

The Howard Stern prank call reminded me of C-Span, which, as you will see in the video below, is pranked often. Beware, some of these are really dirty:

"... and I look forward to a future of worshipping the prostate of Howard Stern."

It's early, by we think we have already seen our favorite thing of the day. Yesterday, a fan of Howard Stern prank called ESPN's SportCenter ("SportCentre" for our Canuck readers) while they were live on the air by pretending to be Brian Westbrook, the All Pro running back for the Philadelphia Eagles who was cut by the team.

Speedo Guy II

One of our favorite things we've ever posted was Speedo Guy.


Here is another rendition of the meme from Valentines Day this year:

New mascot trick